People's Expectations of You Literally Mean Nothing
People expect many things from you. Your parents expect you to act a certain way, they expect you to achieve certain goals. Your friends most likely expect you to speak to them in a certain way, to hang out with them a certain way. You are constantly expected to fit and attain a certain image that other people have made for you. But do they ever ask what you expect of yourself, and if they do will they really be happy if you say you expect yourself to be something completely different to their already constructed version of who you are meant to be? Of course they don't, they don't really care what you think because their opinion is right. Right?
Now I know it sounds quite ludacris to say that the people who love you will be disappointed if you follow what YOU really WANT to do, but in many cases this is the reality. I know that when I shy away from what other people expect of me I get given the, "I'm really disappointed in you," "You could do so much better," "I can't believe you did that", "What the hell is going through your head", or my all time favourite "But you have so much potential." When you don't live up to people's expectations I can't say they are very happy, and more often than not, they continue to put the pressure on you to fulfil it resulting in an immense amount of guilt and further loss of control over your situation, decisions and overall lifestyle. It is time for us to reinforce that expectations are unfair on everyone and we need to disengage from this toxic habit in order to let our true selves, well, bloom.
When you think about it, expectations are the most unfair thing that can be put upon you. They force you to rethink every decision you have made, or will make, and are continually hovering over you, inhibiting you from choosing things that you genuinely want to do or be. Expectations stunt your individual growth and they hurt your unique quirky side from being unleashed as they scare away any idea that you can actually do or be what other people don't want you to be. I guess what I am really trying to say is, you do not deserve to have other people's expectations around you, and in the long run they should not, and do not, mean anything to you.
One of the most important things I have learned over the last 3 months is that it's ok to do things that other people don't think you should do, as long as it's not physically or emotionally impacting someone else negatively. Many people expected me to go to Uni, move out of home etc. and I followed those expectations, I fulfilled that lifestyle that everyone expected me to have, and all I have to show for it is probably some of the most miserable months of my life. This is because this wasn't the right lifestyle for me and my own expectations of myself, I just followed the motions that were paved out for me by other people without ever considering if this was MY actual path. Now that I am back at my real home, deferring my studies and shutting out all expectations that people have about me, I have never ever felt better.
People's expectations of you literally mean nothing. It is their way to try to control you, to get you to become someone that THEY want, not someone that YOU want. Sometime's people will comment, "it's for the best" but at the same time, YOU need to trust that you know what is the best for you. It is time for you to imagine, in your heart of hearts, who you see yourself as. Who do you want to be? If you could be anyone and do anything, wear anything and become any profession, posses any lifestyle that you wanted, without anyone making you feel guilty about it, what would it be?
Now that, that imagination right there, is what you need to start achieving. Don't let people's expectations of you rule your life, don't let them into your psyche because all they are going to do is stop you from achieving the things you want to achieve and stop you from being fully content with yourself. At the end of the day, these people who expect things from you don't live your life, you live your life and you have to live with yourself and your lifestyle everyday, so why the hell would you try to build it to cater towards someone else's needs? Yeah, I didn't think so...
Lots of love,
Sugar Maddy xoxo.
P.S. If you haven't liked it already, YOU SHOULD LIKE MY NEW FACEBOOK PAGE! Just search "Suagr Maddy" ;)
,
Now I know it sounds quite ludacris to say that the people who love you will be disappointed if you follow what YOU really WANT to do, but in many cases this is the reality. I know that when I shy away from what other people expect of me I get given the, "I'm really disappointed in you," "You could do so much better," "I can't believe you did that", "What the hell is going through your head", or my all time favourite "But you have so much potential." When you don't live up to people's expectations I can't say they are very happy, and more often than not, they continue to put the pressure on you to fulfil it resulting in an immense amount of guilt and further loss of control over your situation, decisions and overall lifestyle. It is time for us to reinforce that expectations are unfair on everyone and we need to disengage from this toxic habit in order to let our true selves, well, bloom.
When you think about it, expectations are the most unfair thing that can be put upon you. They force you to rethink every decision you have made, or will make, and are continually hovering over you, inhibiting you from choosing things that you genuinely want to do or be. Expectations stunt your individual growth and they hurt your unique quirky side from being unleashed as they scare away any idea that you can actually do or be what other people don't want you to be. I guess what I am really trying to say is, you do not deserve to have other people's expectations around you, and in the long run they should not, and do not, mean anything to you.
One of the most important things I have learned over the last 3 months is that it's ok to do things that other people don't think you should do, as long as it's not physically or emotionally impacting someone else negatively. Many people expected me to go to Uni, move out of home etc. and I followed those expectations, I fulfilled that lifestyle that everyone expected me to have, and all I have to show for it is probably some of the most miserable months of my life. This is because this wasn't the right lifestyle for me and my own expectations of myself, I just followed the motions that were paved out for me by other people without ever considering if this was MY actual path. Now that I am back at my real home, deferring my studies and shutting out all expectations that people have about me, I have never ever felt better.
People's expectations of you literally mean nothing. It is their way to try to control you, to get you to become someone that THEY want, not someone that YOU want. Sometime's people will comment, "it's for the best" but at the same time, YOU need to trust that you know what is the best for you. It is time for you to imagine, in your heart of hearts, who you see yourself as. Who do you want to be? If you could be anyone and do anything, wear anything and become any profession, posses any lifestyle that you wanted, without anyone making you feel guilty about it, what would it be?
Now that, that imagination right there, is what you need to start achieving. Don't let people's expectations of you rule your life, don't let them into your psyche because all they are going to do is stop you from achieving the things you want to achieve and stop you from being fully content with yourself. At the end of the day, these people who expect things from you don't live your life, you live your life and you have to live with yourself and your lifestyle everyday, so why the hell would you try to build it to cater towards someone else's needs? Yeah, I didn't think so...
Lots of love,
Sugar Maddy xoxo.
P.S. If you haven't liked it already, YOU SHOULD LIKE MY NEW FACEBOOK PAGE! Just search "Suagr Maddy" ;)
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